Culinerd

How to make apple pie that doesn't suck

2011-12-06T10:17:00.000-08:00

I know, I know. You hear the words "homemade apple pie" and your eyes begin darting around, searching for the nearest rock to hide under. I feel your pain. I used to be one of those people. For all my baking awesomeness, pies (and pie crusts) had long been a low point for me.

After pleading my case to my grandma, the Queen of Apple Pie herself, she took me under her wing, and gave me the lesson of a lifetime in pie-making expertise. And because I fully subscribe to the notion of sharing the wealth, I've compiled a easy to remember collect of tips and tricks for making apple pie that doesn't suck.

USE TWO KINDS OF APPLES I can't begin to tell you how frustrating it is when I hear so-called foodies spouting the erroneous message that you're only supposed to use one type of apple when making an apple pie. While it's true that some apples are far better for baking than others, that doesn't mean that you've got to limit yourself to just one type of apple. I almost always use Granny Smith and McIntosh apples because they both hold their texture well, and they both have great, full flavours.

PRE-COOK YOUR APPLES I know what you're thinking, and I promise, I thought the same thing when I first heard this tip. However, I promise your apples will not resemble soggy cardboard if you pre-cook them. I double promise. The trick is to throw your sliced apples into a pot with sugar and spice, cover and cook over low heat, stirring frequently, until the apples are tender. Easy, right? And believe me when I tell you that you'll notice a difference in the way your pie tastes. (Here's a quick reference recipe for pre-cooking your apples)

DEEP DISH OR GTFO What's the best part of a pie? The filling. What do you get with a deep dish pie? MOAR FILLING. 'Nuff said.

MAKE YOUR OWN CRUST, WITH ICE COLD INGREDIENTS If there's one thing that raw dough likes to be, it's cold. Keep your butter and/or lard in the refrigerator until the moment you need it, and always use ice water to moisten the flour/butter mixture. Also, after you've rolled your dough out and fitted it into your pie plate, let it sit covered in the fridge for 30 minutes before filling it with your pie filling. If the fats warm inside the dough before you cook it, your crust will turn out tough and cardboard like. Yuck.

USE INSTANT TAPIOCA Wait... what? Seriously. Don't adjust your monitor. You read that correctly. By sprinkling about a teaspoon onto the bottom of the crust, and a teaspoon over top of the filling before covering it with the top crust, you're doing your pie and anyone eating your pie a huge solid. Just that tiny bit of instant tapioca, entirely undetectable after baking, ensures that your pie's filling has a smooth yet firm texture that stays between the crusts, even if you slice into it's while it's still warm. Now stop looking at me like I'm a weirdo, and just try it.

And there you have it, ladies and gentlemen. If you don't experience pie ecstasy after following these tips and tricks for making apple pie, then you're still doing it wrong.

Do you have any pie making tricks? Feel free to share them in the comments below.

mini chicken pot pies

2011-11-27T17:28:00.000-08:00

I admit that, sometimes, I get ambitious. It's somewhat unfortunate that that ambition only ever occurs in the kitchen, but such is the life of a culinary nerd. Now, let's get to what's important here: these awesome, personal pies that'll warm you from the inside out this winter. It's perfect for a cozy little family dinner. This recipe is based on Ina Garten's lobster pot pie recipe.

Yields 4-5 pies

What you'll need:
Oven-safe baking bowls (I use french onion soup bowls)
Food processor (not necessary, but it'll make your life easier)

Pie filling:
1 1/2 cups chopped Spanish onion
3/4 cup chopped fennel
1/2 cup unsalted butter
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
2 1/2 cups chicken stock
1 tbsp your favourite white wine, loving
1 1/2 tsp sea salt
1 tsp black pepper
3 tbsp heavy cream
2 boneless, skinless, cooked chicken breasts (*see below)
1 1/2 cups frozen peas
1 1/2 cups whole pearl onions
1/4 cup minced flat-leaf parsley
1/4 cup minced dill

Pastry top:
3 cups all-purpose flour
1 1/2 tsp sea salt
1 tsp baking powder
8 tbsp lard, diced -- The real stuff. Not that vegetable shortening shit, you hippie.
8 tbsp cold unsalted butter, diced
1/2 to 2/3 cup ice water
egg wash (1 egg beaten with 1 tbsp heavy cream)

Directions:

1. Saute onions and fennel in butter in a large saute pan on medium heat until onions are translucent, which should take about 15 minutes.

2. Add flour and cook on low heat for 3 more minutes.

3. Slowly add stock, wine, salt, and pepper, and then simmer for about 5 more minutes.

4. Whisk in heavy cream.

5. Chop the chicken into bite size cubes. Place chicken, frozen peas, onions, and herbs in a bowl. Pour the sauce over the mixture and set aside.

6. For crust, mix flour, salt, and baking powder in a food processor fitted with a metal blade. Add the lard and butter, and let it run until small balls form. LOL.

7. Add ice water. Process just until the dough comes together. Turn dough out on a lightly floured surface, and knead quickly. Wrap dough in plastic and allow to rest in the fridge for about 30 minutes.

8. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees.

9. Roll dough out to about 1/4 inch thickness. Place one of your pot pie bowls upside down on dough, and cut a circle of dough about 1/2 inch from the edge of the bowl.

10. Fill dishes with pie filling. Cover each dish with pastry, and lightly fold down and press the edges against the bowl. Brush a generous amount of egg wash on each pastry bowl. Make 1 or 2 small slashes in the pastry.

11. Bake for 45 minutes, until the top is golden brown.

Enjoy!

(*For the chicken, I wrap two breast in thick cut bacon, and bake them for 45 minutes at 375 degrees. Simple and delicious.)

sriracha cheese bread

2011-05-09T18:07:00.000-07:00

Anyone who knows me knows how obsessive I am with sriracha. What better way is there to celebrate the best hot sauce on the planet than to make swirly cheese bread with it? That's what I thought.

Ingredients
1 3/4 cups homogenized milk (3.25%)
2 tbsp unsalted butter
2 tbsp granulate sugar
1 (8g) package instant dry yeast
4 cups unbleached all-purpose flour
2 tsp sea salt
1/4 cup sriracha
1 cup (ish) shredded cheddar (or whatever kind, really) cheese
5 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
cooking spray

1. In a small saucepan, warm milk, butter, and sugar over medium-low heat. Stir occasionally and remove from heat as soon as butter has completely melted. Liquid should be at ab.out 100 degrees Fahrenheit, or lukewarm to the touch.

2. Transfer to a medium sized bowl and add yeast. Gently and quickly stir to combine, and let proof for 10-13 minutes - until there is a layer of froth on the top.

3. In a large bowl, combine flour and salt. After the yeast has had time to proof, pour the milk mixture over the flour. Mix with a wooden spoon until dough is raggedly formed. Dump the bowl of raggedy dough onto a well floured surface and knead into a ball. (about 2-3 minutes of light kneading)

4. Transfer ball of dough in a lightly oiled bowl. Turn the dough around inside the bowl so that it's completely covered in oil. Cover with a damp towel and allow to rise for 20 minutes.

5. Turn dough out once again onto a well floured surface, and knead for approximately 5 minutes. Repeat step 4, only this time, let it sit for 45 minutes to an hour.

6. Again, turn out onto a well floured surface, and flatten it out into a 9"x5" rectangle. Spread sriracha over top and sprinkle cheese over top of that.

7. Roll the dough the same way you would a cinnamon roll, forming a cheesy, sriracha-y swirl. Place the loaf in a greased loaf pan seam side down, cover with a damp cloth, and allow to rise again for another 20 minutes. This will just give the bread a little extra time to get to know all the flavours.

8. Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Slice a 1/4 inch deep slit in the top of the loaf, and then bake for 30 minutes. After 30 minutes, remove the loaf from the pan and place it back in the oven for 10-15 minutes.

9. Allow the loaf to cool completely before slicing, and enjoy!

Bread will stay fresh for up to 4 days in an air-tight container. Freezes well in air-tight containers, too!

double maple cupcakes

2011-05-07T15:25:00.000-07:00

I took a four day trip out of Canada, and it was too much for me. I came back, ran to my fridge, grabbed the nearest jug of pure Canadian maple syrup, and fell to the floor in a heap of unbridled patriotism. I'll never leave you again, Canada. *weep*

Maple cake
1/2 cup granulated sugar
5 tbsp unsalted butter, room temperature
2 eggs
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
1/2 tsp maple extract
1 1/4 cup unbleached all purpose flour
1 1/4 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp sea salt
1/4 cup milk
1/4 cup pure maple syrup

1. Beat sugar and butter together completely. Add eggs in one at a time and beat until fluffy. Add both extracts, and beat until completely combined. That's a lot of beating, I know.

2.Sift in flour, baking powder, and sea salt and mix on low until roughly incorporated. Add milk and syrup and mix for approximately 2 minutes until batter is light and fluffy. Kind of like a bowl of clouds.

3. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Fill 12 cupcake liners 2/3 of the way.

4. Bake for 20-25 minutes.

5. Let cool completely before icing!

SUPER SIMPLE Maple frosting
4 tbsp pure maple syrup, loving
2 tbsp unsalted butter, room temperature
1/2 tsp pure vanilla extract
1/2 tsp maple extract
tiny pinch of sea salt
1 3/4 powdered sugar

1. Combine all ingredients (except powdered sugar) in a glass bowl, and let them melt together over a pot of bowling water (like this). That's called using indirect heat, bro. Check yo'self. Whisk gently until completely combined.

2. Beat in powdered sugar 1/2 cup at a time. Feel free to add more maple syrup. AND THAT'S IT! I know, right?

You can also drizzle the iced cupcakes with a little extra maple syrup. Seriously, there's no such thing as too much maple syrup.

Enjoy!

Banana cupcakes with chocolate frosting

2011-04-03T17:15:00.000-07:00

Bananas and chocolate go together like bacon and eggs - although I'm not sure how well a bacon and eggs cupcake would fair. With that mental note made, let's get to work. Those borderline rotten bananas aren't going to cook themselves. P.S. This recipe is as simple as it is delicious.

Banana cupcakes

2 cups unbleached pastry flour
3/4 cup white sugar
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp sea salt
1/2 cup unsalted butter, melted
3 large ripe bananas
2 large eggs
1/2 tsp pure vanilla extract

1. In a medium size bowl, mash the bananas into a lumpy paste (YUM!). Whisk in melted butter, eggs (one at a time), and vanilla in that order. Set aside.

2. In a large bowl, sift all dry ingredients together.

3. Combine wet and dry ingredients in the large bowl. Mix well.

4. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line a muffin tin with cupcake liners. Fill each cup about 3/4 of the way. Bake for 25-30 minutes.

5. Let cool completely before icing.

Chocolate frosting

1/4 cup unsalted butter, melted
1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1/3 cup milk
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
2-3 cups powdered sugar

1. Combine melted butter and cocoa powder to make a dark brown paste (again., YUM!). Add milk and vanilla and mix well.

2. Add powdered sugar 1/2 at a time until you reach your desired level of sweetness.

3. Let sit in the refrigerator for 20 minutes, and then slather lovingly atop your cupcakes.

ENJOY!

Belgian Barista Cupcakes

2011-01-08T12:01:00.000-08:00

These cupcakes all the sweetness of a mini Starbucks all packed into one handful of deliciousness. A moist chocolate cake, riddled with savoury pistachios, and topped with a Belgian dark chocolate and espresso butter cream icing. They're rich and decadent, and they're a perfect midday pick-me-up. Try your best not to fall in love with these cupcakes. Your hips will thank you.

Cake recipe

1/2 cup Dutch-processed cocoa powder
1 cup boiling hot water
1 1/3 cup unbleached all-purpose flour
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp sea salt
1 cup raw pistachios
1/2 cup unsalted butter, room temperature
1 cup white sugar
2 large eggs
2 tsp pure vanilla extract

1. In a small bowl, whisk cocoa powder and boiling water together. Let set in refrigerator until it reaches room temperature.

2. In a large bowl, sift flour, baking powder, and salt together. Stir in pistachios.

3. In a medium bowl, beat butter and sugar until fluffy. Add one egg at time, incorporating completely before adding the next one. Then add the vanilla.

4. Combine the flour mixture and the butter/sugar mixture, and then add the cocoa/water mixture. Beat until completely incorporated.

5. Preheat oven to 350 degrees, and line 16 muffin cups with paper liners. Fill each liner about two-thirds of the way full. Bake for 16-22 minutes (depending on your oven). Let cool completely before icing.

Belgian dark chocolate butter cream frosting with espresso

6 oz Belgian dark chocolate, chopped
1/4 cup whipping cream (35%)
2 tsp instant espresso powder, heaping
1 cup unsalted butter, room temperature
1 cup powdered sugar

1. Using indirect heat - place a glass bowl over a small pot of bowling water. Whisk espresso powder and cream together in the bowl while it warms up. Add chocolate and continue stirring with a spatula until it's completely melted and combined. Remove bowl from heat and let cool to room temperature, stirring occasionally.

2. Once chocolate mixture has cooled, beat together with butter until smooth.

3. Sift powdered sugar and use a spatula to fold it into the chocolate/butter combination (to avoid sugar flying everywhere). Beat on high until fluffy.

To frost the cupcakes, you can either be lazy and use a spatula/knife to slather it on, or you can use a piping bag and make it look a little fancier. Extra icing will keep in the fridge for about a week.

ENJOY!

blueberry & peach crisp

2010-08-21T08:12:00.000-07:00

As we prepare to bid farewell to the Summertime, we need not cry tears of sadness. It's not all bad. Even though we're just leaving peach season, and nearing the end of blueberry season, now is the perfect time for this dessert. It's a quick and easy pick-me-up, so no excuses.

Fruit
6 peaches, peeled and sliced
1 cup blueberries
1 tbsp lemon juice
1 tbsp all-purpose flour

Topping
1/4 cup (seperate) all-purpose flour
1 cup golden yellow sugar
1 1/4 cup rolled oats
1/3 cup unsalted butter, soft
1 tsp ground cinnamon
1/4 tsp ground nutmeg
pinch of ground sea salt

1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

2. Arrange peaches and blueberries in a greased baking dish and sprinkle with lemon juice. Toss with four (1 tbsp).

3. In a large bowl, combine flour (1/4 cup), sugar, salt, cinnamon, nutmeg, and oats. Cut in butter until mixture is crumbly.

4. Sprinkle oat mixture over peaches and blueberries.

5. Bake for 35-40 minutes.

Best served with real vanilla ice cream. Feeds about 6. NOM

tomato basil parmigiano focaccia

2010-08-19T16:28:00.000-07:00

A fun twist on pizza. And guess what? You're making the focaccia from scratch.

For the focaccia dough:
1 tsp white sugar
1 (0.25oz or 8g) package active dry yeast
1/3 cup and 5ish tbsp warm water (110 degrees F/45 degrees C)
2 cups unbleached all-purpose flour
2 tbsp extra virgin olive oil

1. In a small bowl, combine sugar, yeast and 1/3 cup warm water. Mix with a fork or small whisk until ingredients are dissolved. Let the mixture stand for about 10 minutes, until it's creamy and stinky.

2. In a large bowl, combine yeast mixture and flour and stir well. Mix in the additional water, 1 tbsp at a time until all flour has been incorporated.

3. Once the dough has come together, turn it out onto a lightly floured surface. Knead for < 1 minute.

4. Lightly oil a large bowl and place the dough inside. Roll dough around bowl to coat in oil completely. Cover with dampened tea towel. Let rest in a warm place for 20-30 minutes.

5. Deflate and knead briefly. Roll or press dough onto a large, lightly greased cookie sheet to look like a pizza crust (not so thin, though. Also, if you're using a rolling pin, be sure not to roll over the edges. This makes it easier for it to bake evenly. It gives it a rustic look, too. Yay.)

For the topping:
2 medium-large tomatoes, sliced
fresh, whole basil leaves
parmigiano-reggiano
1 clove garlic
2-3 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
freshly ground black pepper and sea salt to taste

Mince the garlic, and then combine with olive oil and let it sit for a couple of hours (or a whole day -- the longer, the better, really). After the oil has sat for however long you want it to, you can either strain the garlic out or just dump it all on top of the bread dough.

Spread oil evenly atop the dough. Season with black pepper and sea salt. Arrange basil leaves (as many or as little as you want). Place tomato slices on top of basil. Next, shave as much or as little parmigiano on top as you prefer. Note: try not to die from delicious fragrance wafting from your creation.

At this point, you can let it sit on the counter for another hour or so. It's not necessary, but I'd recommend it. Give those ingredients some time alone to get to know each other and make delicious flavours together.

Preheat oven to 450 degrees.

Bake for 15-25 minutes, depending on your desired level of crispiness.

Cut like a pizza, and omnomnomnom away.

Buon appetito!

chocolate butter toffee cookies

2010-06-10T21:07:00.000-07:00

Who doesn't love chocolate cookies? Or, for that matter, toffee? Makes perfect sense to throw them together, doesn't it? Yes. Yes, it does.

So, this is actually two recipes in one. Yeah, you're getting a deal. And by deal I mean twice the amount of work. AND double the awesome.

Butter toffee

You'll need a candy thermometer.

1 cup unsalted butter
1 cup granulated white sugar
1/4 cup water
*scant1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp vanilla

1. Combine butter, sugar, water and salt in a large, heavy sauce pan or pot.

2. Cook over medium-high to high heat, stirring often, until candy thermometer reads 305 degrees.

3. Remove from heat and stir in vanilla.

4. Immediately pour onto a cookie sheet covered with lightly greased tin foil. Spread the toffee out evenly. Let it cool completely.

Chocolate cookies

You're gonna need a big ass bowl for this one, son. And one medium sized bowl, too.

2 3/4 cups all purpose flour
3/4 cup cocoa powder
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp baking powder
1 cup unsalted butter, room temperature
1 3/4 cups granulated white sugar
2 large eggs
2 tsp pure vanilla extract

1. In the larger bowl, beat the butter and sugar together with an electric mixer until light and fluffy (about 3 to 4 minutes).

2. Add the eggs, one at a time. Be sure to beat each egg in completely.

3. Add vanilla and beat until combined.

4. In the smaller bowl, sift together flour, baking powder, cocoa, and salt. Make sure they're well mixed together.

5. Add the flour mixture to the butter mixture. Make sure that you mix everything together completely. Use a spatula or a giant spoon. And for god's sake, don't use your hands. This shit is sticky as hell. I learned that the hard way.

6. Divide the dough in half, and roll each half into a cylinder that's about 6-7 inches long and 1.5-2 inches in diameter. Wrap each half in plastic wrap, and refrigerate for about two hours (Or, do what I do, and refrigerate it over night. The longer the dough has to sit and think about what it's done, the better the cookie will be. Remember that.)

6. Preheat oven to 350 degrees and place rack in the center of the oven. Line two baking sheets with parchment paper (or spray it with Pam or something. We're not all hippies, I realize.)

7. Remove the chilled dough from the refrigerator and, on a lightly floured surface, cut 1/4 inch thick slices. Space the cookies out on the sheet approximately 1 inch apart.

8. Now for the fun part. Bust the toffee up into tiny, deliciously crumbly pieces and sprinkle them atop each cookie. Also, sprinkle a little freshly ground sea salt on top, too. Just for a little extra kick of somethin-somethin. Totally optional.

9. Bake cookies for about 10 - 12 minutes (depending on size) or until they are firm around the edges.

10. Let cookies cool on baking sheet for a few minutes before you transfer them to a wire rack to finish cooling.

YAY!

raspberry lemonade

2010-05-30T11:57:00.000-07:00

When I hear people complain about the heat, I want to punch them in the kidneys. But that would be rude. So, I make lemonade instead. Nothing cures a case of summer-heat-woes better than an ice cold glass of homemade raspberry lemonade. It's refreshing and core-cooling. And there's really just something therapeutic about juicing lemons the old fashioned way, isn't there?

10 lemons, juice and zest of

7 cups water

3(ish) cups ice cubes

2 cups raspberries (Fresh or frozen. I prefer fresh. Also, 2 cups is only a suggestion. Go nuts.)

simple syrup (1 cup water, 1 cup granulated sugar)

fresh mint leaves for garnishing (optional)

1. Zest those lemons. All of 'em. That's where all of that awesome lemon flavour is hiding.

2. Now juice them! Tip: roll those bitches around on the counter (somewhat agressively) before you half and juice them. It just makes it a little easier to get as much juice as possible out of them.

3. Add the zest to the juice, and let it stand for an hour or so.

4. Meanwhile, prepare simple syrup. (Combine 1 cup water and 1 cup sugar in sauce pan over medium-high heat. Bring to boil, and then remove from heat. Pour into glass container and let it cool in the fridge before using.)

5. Strain lemon juice into a large juice pitcher with ice.

6. Add simple syrup, water, and raspberries. Stir.

7. Garnish with mint leaves. (optional)

Makes a great mixed drink with vodka, rum, or gin -- all tried and tested by your's truly, I don't mind saying.

So, stop complaining about this beautiful, hot summer weather. It's not too hot. You just need some lemonade.

vegan chocolate buttercream icing

2010-05-28T13:30:00.000-07:00

If you like chocolate icing, you will looooooove this recipe. It. Is. Decadent.

You'll need an electric beater for this recipe (also what she said.)
Yields enough icing for 12 cupcakes. Double or triple for whole cakes.

1/4 cup nonhydrogenated shortening
1/4 cup nonhydrogenated margarine (Earth Balance or vegan Becel)
1 1/2 cups icing sugar, sifted
1/8 heaping cup cocoa powder, sifted
1 teaspoons vanilla extract
1/8 cup chocolate soy milk

1. With a fork, cream shortening and margarine together with a fork.

2. Add cocoa and beat on low-medium speed until completely mixed.

3. Add soy milk, and beat on low speed until completely mixed. Beat on medium-high speed until entire amount of sugar is used. (You might adjust the amount of sugar according to your desired sweetness. Just stick your finger in and taste it. Don't be afraid.)

5. Add vanilla and mix on medium-high speed until fluffy, about two minutes.

Enjoy!

vegan buttercream icing

2010-05-02T20:16:00.000-07:00

I've been promising a lot people that I'd share this recipe with them, so here it (finally) is! This is my go-to recipe for vegan cupcakes. It's versatile and delicious and, like always, super simple. The ingredients are also easy to find which is a nice change for a vegan recipe. There's no 'essence of organic butterfly tears' in this recipe. You're welcome.

You'll need an electric hand mixer.
Yields enough icing for 12 cupcakes.

1/4 cup nonhydrogenated vegetable shortening

1/4 cup nonhydrogenated margarine (I use Becel)

1 3/4 cups powdered sugar, sifted

1 teaspoons flavour extract

1/8 cup plain soy milk

1. With a fork, cream shortening and margarine together with a fork.

2. Add the sifted icing sugar 1/4 cup at a time. Mix using electric mixer until all sugar is used. (You might adjust the amount of sugar according to your desired sweetness)

3. Add soy milk and flavour extract and mix on low-medium speed until fluffy (usually about two minutes, adjusting for room temperature and other various 'acts of God')

I usually let it sit in the fridge for 20 minutes or so before I frost my cupcakes with it. It stays fluffy, but it just seems to gain and maintain a some stiffness if it's been chilled before hand.

So that's it. Go nuts with different flavours and colours. You can basically add any flavour extract and colour you want, and the result will always be awesome.

Enjoy!

lavender & lemon cookie recipe

2010-05-01T07:39:00.000-07:00

Let me just tell you a little something about these cookies. Whoever thought of putting lemon and lavender together was brilliant. What an interesting and delicious combination. In every bite, you can taste the individual flavours: the bright and tart citrusy flavour of lemon zest, and the wonderfully light and floral flavour of the lavender. When you bake these two flavours together, they marry beautifully.

Refreshing, loaded with flavour without being overbearing, and super simple. These cookies are perfect to have with a hot cup of tea or a cold glass of iced tea.

3/4 cup white sugar
2 tbsp grated lemon zest
2 tbsp lemon juice
2 tsp dried lavender
1 3/4 cup all-purpose flour
1/4 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp sea salt
12 tbsp (1 1/2 sticks) cold unsalted butter, cut into 1/2" cubes
1 egg yolk
1/2 tsp pure vanilla extract

(If you don't have a food processor, follow these by-hand directions)

1. In a food processor, combine sugar, lemon zest and lavender until completely incorporated and sugar is damp from zest.

2. In a large bowl, sift together flour, salt, and baking powder.

3. Combine sugar/lemon/lavender mixture with the flour mixture with a whisk.

4. Return this mixture to food processor, and then scatter butter cubes over mixture, and process until mixture resembles cornmeal.

5. In a measuring cup, beat together the lemon juice, egg yolk and vanilla.

6. Slowly add the egg mixture to the food processor while it's running, and continue processing until the dough forms into a ball.

7. Move dough to a clean, dry work surface, and roll it quickly into a cylinder. It should be approximately 12 inches long and 1 1/2 inches in diameter.

8. Wrap the dough tightly in plastic wrap and chill in the fridge for 2 hours or in the freezer for 40-45 minutes.

9. Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

10. Cut chilled dough into cookie slices that are approximately 3/8 of inch thick.

11. Spray cookie sheet with non-stick spray, and place cookies 1 inch apart.

12. Baking time can be anywhere from 10 to 16 minutes, depending on the thickness of your cookies and on your oven. If they aren't finished after 10 minutes, just keep a momentary eye on them until the edges have browned slightly.

13. Let cool completely on racks. Store in sealed container for longer lasting freshness.

Enjoy!

(picture from When Harry Met Salad)

mini baklava recipe

2010-04-30T14:18:00.000-07:00

WARNING -- The following recipe is a labor of love. And that's probably an understatement. Though this is like daisy picking in comparison to making homemade pasta without a pasta machine (what was I thinking?), it's still a lot of work. However, the end almost always justifies the means, right? Right. The hard work contained in this recipe is well worth it, I promise.

This is my rendition of Giada de Laurentiis' mini baklava recipe.

You'll need a mini muffin tin.

1/2 cup almonds
1/2 cup walnuts
1/4 cup plain bread crumbs
2 tablespoons sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ground cloves
Pinch of sea salt
1 cup unsalted butter, melted
3 tablespoons honey (I use President's Choice Organic Creamed Wildflower Honey because it adds another dimension of floral flavour)
6 sheets fillo dough

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.

2. Place the almonds, walnuts, bread crumbs, sugar, cinnamon, ground cloves, and salt in a food processor until the mixture is very finely chopped.

3. Transfer the mixture to a small bowl. Add 2 tablespoons of the melted butter and the honey and stir to combine. (You might want to soften the honey in the microwave just so it's a little easier to mix in.)

4. On a dry work surface place 1 sheet of fillo. Using a pastry brush and the remaining melted butter, lightly cover the entire sheet of phyllo with melted butter.

5. Cover the first sheet with a second sheet of phyllo and brush with melted butter. Continue this process with all six sheets of fillo.

6. Cut the stacked fillo rectangle into 12 equal pieces (Cut lengthwise into 4 pieces and widthwise into 3 pieces.)

7. Very carefully press each cut piece of phyllo into the mini-muffin tin cups.

8. Fill the fillo cups with the nut mixture (approximately 1 tablespoon -- eye ball it)

9. Pinch the fillo cups closed with your fingers.

10. Bake for 20-25 minutes, or until edges are golden brown.

11. Allow to cool before transferring to a serving plate.

vegan vanilla cupcake

2010-04-26T07:20:00.003-07:00

I've conquered the vanilla side of vegan cupcakes.
From the very first vegan cupcake I baked a month ago, to the pretty little vanilla cupcakes I baked for my brother and his crude, pimply-faced friends (4/20 MUNCHIES!!!!) I feel like my vegan cupcake journey is far from being over.

The basis for this recipe came from Jennifer McCann, author of the cookbook "Vegan Lunch Box." I changed it up only slightly for the first time using it. You can find the original recipe here.

1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
1 1/3 cups plain soymilk
2 cups pastry flour (or regular all purpose)
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp sea salt (or kosher or table)
1 1/8 cups sugar
1/2 cup canola oil
1 3/4 tsp. pure vanilla extract

(This recipe should yield 22 cup cakes, but I make them slightly larger so I got about a dozen.)

Line your muffin pan with your cupcake liners. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Place the apple cider vinegar in the bottom of a liquid measuring cup and fill the cup with soymilk to equal 1 1/2 cups. Stir well and set aside (the mixture will curdle).

In a medium bowl, combine all dry ingredients.

In a large bowl, combine all wet ingredients.

Sift dry into wet ingredients, and then quickly incorporate with a whisk, and then completely mix together with an electric beater for about a minute. (Or until it looks like everything is mixed and smooth)

Fill muffin cups with 1/4 cup of batter each (or more if you want bigger cupcakes. You'll just have to adjust baking time accordingly)

Bake for 15-20 minutes. If you're making larger cupcakes like I did, do a toothpick test after 20 minutes and sort of use that as a guide. It took about 22-23 minutes for mine.

Let cupcakes cool completely before icing.

Et voila!

simple is sweet.

2010-04-26T07:20:00.001-07:00

I know it's not quite strawberry season yet, but I can't help the $1.99 boxes at the grocery store. Strawberries just excite me. So, when I get them home, chop them up, and take a bite, I'm a little let down. They just don't taste like July to me.

"Probably because it isn't July, you moron."

Don't rain on my parade. Just give me STRAWBERRIES THAT TASTE LIKE EFFING STRAWBERRIES, DAMN IT.

Rejoice! All is not lost. I've found a way to breath a little life into out-of-season strawberries. And it's quite simple.

For every 1 cup (ish) of chopped strawberries, add a tsp each of fresh lemon juice and fresh lime juice. You might feel like that's too much, so just play around with the amounts to find which best suit your palette.

Not only does the acidity of the lemon and lime awaken the tired strawberry flavour, but it also adds just a hint of bright and bitter citrus flavour. Like a little morsel of a hot July day by the pool in every bite.

Sweeten with a little fruit sugar (just eyeball it), and then use this delicious and wonderfully fragrant creation as a topping for vanilla ice cream/frozen yogurt/gelato. Oh baby.

Enjoy!

vegan chocolate cupcake recipe

2010-04-26T07:19:00.002-07:00

The recipe I use is closely based on that of Jinxi Boo, though I have changed it up a little bit. Hope you enjoy!

1 cup soy milk
1 teaspoon lemon juice
3/4 cup sugar
1/3 cup canola oil
1 1/2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract (you can use artificial, too)
1 cup pastry flour
1/3 cup cocoa powder
3/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon sea salt

1) Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Place your cupcake liners into muffin tin.

2) In a large mixing bowl, stir together the soy milk, lemon juice, sugar, canola oil and vanilla. (What I usually do is quickly mix everything together with a whisk and then I use an electric mixer on the slowest setting for about 25-30 seconds)

3) In a separate bowl, stir together the flour, cocoa, baking soda & powder, and salt. Sift the dry ingredients into the wet ingredients, and stir until all the lumps are removed. (Again, first I used to whisk to incorporate all ingredients, and then I use the electric mixer on slowest setting for approximately one minute.)

4) Pour the batter into the cupcake liners.

5) Bake until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean (about 18-20 minutes).

6) Allow to cool

Mad props to Jinxi Boo for the basis of this recipe. Check out her blog here.

“Confidence is going after Moby Dick in a rowboat and taking the tartar sauce with you.” ~Zig Ziglar

2010-04-26T07:19:00.000-07:00

There are few things in life we can't live without: Air, water, sleep, tartar sauce.

I'm making Scottish style Haddock for dinner tonight, and as I was making the tartar sauce, I thought I'd share the recipe for this little bowl of heaven with you.

1/3 cup mayo (get the real stuff, you hippie)
3/4 tsp prepared mustard (really, though, you can use any kind of mustard you'd like)
1 tbsp chopped mini sweet green pickles (or sweet relish if you're having a lazy day)
1 tsp lemon juice (fresh is best, but again, laziness is okay)

SUPER simple. SUPER delicious.

Enjoy!

inspiration.

2010-04-26T07:18:00.001-07:00

I KNEW there was a reason I started this ridiculous endeavour of trying to read 10,000 pages in five months.

In the midst of reading Tony Bourdain's Kitchen Confidential, I was struck with an urge. Like a crack-addict looking for a fix, I ran, literally RAN, to the grocery store in search of a culinary fix. And thank the gods it's almost spring. My grocer's produce section is now riddled with decent bushels of fresh herbs. Among them: Thyme.

The heavens open up.
Rays of sunlight shower the shelf in front of me.
Angels sing the sweet sounds of deliciousness.

I. Love. Spring.

So I bought a bag of thyme sprigs, and, as usual, I had no idea what I was going to do with it. I brought it home, put it in the fridge, and sat at the kitchen table. What can I do with fresh thyme? In walks my veg-head brother.
Perfect. He loves pasta. AND! I'm sure there's a box of whole wheat penne in the cupboard. So it went.

Creamy parmigiano and white wine sauce with thyme and slow roasted garlic, on whole wheat penne. And then I quickly roasted a bunch of fresh asparagus with freshly ground sea salt, freshly ground black pepper, and extra virgin olive oil. Quickly roasted, as in, roasted for 10 minutes at 400 degrees, until they've just turned that beautifully irresistible crispy green colour, and you just smell that orgasm-inducing roasted asparagus smell. No..? Just me..? Okay..

Anyways -- INCREDIBLE. This was the first time I'd ever made a pasta sauce from scratch, and I gotta say. I'm quite impressed with myself, and more than a little relieved to find that, even if I do nothing else over the course of this entire Quest for 10,000, it will not have been in vain.

Good food equates a happy life.

Oh, in case you were wondering why there's no picture...
Yeah. It didn't survive long enough. Sorry.

venturing into vegan territory.

2010-04-26T07:17:00.002-07:00

A strange, strange place to be, with nary an animal protein to be found. But surprisingly (or not surprisingly,) it's actually pretty tasty here. And healthy. And pretty. And fucking tasty. Did I say that already?

I know I'm a little late playing into the vegan cupcake craze, but I was hit with a sudden urge to venture into the unknown the other day, and I figured using baking as an outlet was the safest way to satisfy the craving. You know, aside from hopping into a blackhole or something -- as inviting as that sounds.

The recipe for the cupcakes was created by Jinxi Boo. And if you're at all interested in vegan cuisine, I suggest you check out her blog. She's ultrafab, and I think I've already fallen in love with her beautiful and funny-shaped head. Now, Jinxi says this recipes makes 12 cupcakes, but I only got nine out of it. Not a big deal.

The recipe for the icing came from a quick Google search for "vegan cake icing." GENIUS. I know, right. I basically read the words "butter cream" and was immediately sold on it.

...WTF are calories? Who cares?! Not me.

I did, however, cut the recipe in half because this particular recipe yields enough waistline-unfriendly icing to fill a small-to-medium sized bathtub. Unless, of course, you're into that. In any case, in the the interest of not being wasteful, cutting the icing recipe in half will give you enough for the cupcakes, with just enough left over to eat with your finger.

Or a spoon. Go for it. Be fearless.

Enjoy!

sinfully delish.

2010-04-26T07:17:00.000-07:00

This culinary adventure started, as they usually do, in the grocery store. I usually make a point of stopping by my grocer's spice rack to stock up on the essentials, occasionally stumbling upon something new and exciting. Enter: lavender.

I'd heard tell of people using lavender as an aromatic element in chicken and lamb dishes. And since I haven't quite conquered my fear of protein yet, I've always b-lined around lavender. I guess I just had a bout of bravery for split second because I decided to pick up a bottle of dried lavender. I read the label, and it informed me that I could stop being a wimp and start doing some herbal research. Apparently lavender is a great element in baking, too. So, I picked it up and inspiration ensued.

This is what I came up with:

toasted almond chocolate pudding, topped with lavender vanilla whipped cream, garnished with shaved white chocolate and a thin butter crumble cookie. A.k.a. YUM.

A dessert that is just layers upon layers of flavour and texture contrasts; a deliciously decadent sensory adventure.

Yes, it's overindulgent and sensory overload, but I wanted to really showcase lavender's ability to be subtle and still be the star of the dish, even with all of the other elements that were present.

Forgive me Robert for I have sinned.

I'll post the recipe and instructions later on. Right now, I'm going to go enjoy the leftovers.